10 January 2008

Bad habits

Since the Blogstalking assignment was my idea, I guess I should answer the question: What is your worst habit?

I have two bad habits.

The first is potentially deadly. I smoke. Yes, I'm one of the few morons left who still lights up. And yes, I know the danger. And yet I persist.

For me, smoking is not an addiction to nicotine. It's a habit. I was in college when I started smoking in earnest. A friend and I would get together late at night and sit in her car and smoke and jabber. Then when we were roommates, we would do the same, only on the back patio instead of her car. This routine of smoking at night carried over through the years after college, to today. I have two cigarettes a day - right before I go to bed. I have no desire to have one any other time of the day except in the 1/2 hour before I go to bed. It's weird, I know, but that's the reason I say my smoking is a habit. It's associated with a certain routine. I know I could go without a cigarette and not go too crazy; I tested myself a couple of months ago and I skipped a night without any problems or cravings. My goal was to quit by my 30th birthday. Well, I'm 33 now. Still haven't quit. This is the year, though. I'll have to quit if I want to get pregnant. Bummer.

My other bad habit, and secret shame, is this:

thumb

This isn't a very good picture, but what it is showing is that I pick at my thumbs. It started as nail biting when I was a kid. Eventually I became a vain teenager and stopped the nail chewing, replacing it with picking at my cuticles, on all my fingers. My thumbs get the worse treatment. Not only do I pick at the cuticles, but the skin all the way down to the first knuckle (which you can see in the picture as the pink portion of my upper thumb), on the front and back of the thumb. It's a nervous habit. I don't even realize I'm doing it most of the time. Any time I have tried to quit, the nervous energy came out in other ways, from chewing my lip to twiddling my hair (which I still do anyway). I'm kind of obsessive about the way my hands look, so it's ironic that I have this destructive and nasty habit.

So, you think I'm gross now don't you? You'd be right :)

13 Comments:

Blogger IrishgirlieKnits said...

All I can say is...I totally understand secret shame #2 (hiding my finger with a bandaid right now!).

12:18 AM  
Blogger Jo said...

Oh - I do the same thing with my thumbs (I thoughtI was the only person who did that!)

Good luck with kicking #1

6:52 AM  
Blogger Batty said...

From what I understand, picking at your thumbs is a pretty common habit. I don't usually pick at anything unless there's a hangnail, in which case, I try to get it off. You're not supposed to, it makes it hurt even more, but it's so annoying!

7:00 AM  
Blogger Georgiann said...

Yes, you are gross and I shall never read your blog again.

Seriously sweetie, I've seen worse habits (I live with worse habits!) Just don't let your thumb get sore and limit your knitting!

7:06 AM  
Blogger Eryn said...

Oh, sugar, those aren't terrible habits! Georgiann may LIVE with worse, but I HAVE worse habits. Why do you think I've been avoiding this one?

I'll try to post the madness later today.

7:25 AM  
Blogger Robin said...

My thumbs are a mess too. I'm mostly better about it than I used to be, but the last couple of weeks have found my poor thumbs quite sore. :(

11:07 AM  
Blogger Magatha said...

Honestly, I wish I still smoked. I was a much happier and healthier person them. ;-)

11:22 AM  
Blogger TechGirl said...

My husband does the thumb thing, too. When he's near me and does it, like if he has his arm around me, I hold his thumb with my hand so he can't pick at it. He doesn't even realize he's doing it until he can't touch his thumb anymore.

10:28 PM  
Blogger Holly said...

I think that thumb/cuticle thing is common, especially among us who have formerly bitten our nails...

Good luck with quitting smoking, and with getting pregnant!

8:41 AM  
Anonymous Kelly said...

Seems like we have a couple of the same bad habits! I don't pick at my cuticles as much as I used to, now I bite my lips.

ALL THE TIME. It's awful.

1:38 PM  
Blogger Dame Wendy said...

I totally have the same habits! My thumb looks just like that. I quit smoking about a month ago but every time I see someone light up on tv, while I'm outside, etc. I yearn for one.

9:34 PM  
Blogger Rebel said...

I don't smoke, but I drink copious amounts of Dr. Pepper, which is almost as bad... it's going to give me diabetes one of these days I'm sure.

And I am a major thumb picker. It's bad. If I keep my hands moisturized and smooth, I'm pretty good, but if they get dry I totally start picking at them... bad bad bad!

12:51 PM  
Blogger Judy Thornton said...

I used to pick my thumbs too exactly the same all the way down to my knuckle - never took pics though. I stopped when I started my blog but I had been doing for years!!! Wow I thought I was the only one who did it too.

6:00 PM  

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